Fate or Reality?
by MaryAuksi
Summary: It's a Jemma, set to season 6. AU, R
1. Chapter 1

_This is my oneshot. First oneshot ever that I have post here. Review please :)_**  
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**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi: The Next Generation. And yes, sometimes I wish I could own it, but it's not going to happen. Don't worry, be happy!**

_**Enjoy:**_

My name is Emma Nelson. I'm 17 years old. I got my period at school back in the 7th grade, I got suspended from school for a week because of a food fight, I was almost shot, I got gonorrhea, and I have anorexia. Other than that, my life's pretty good. I have parents, I have a baby brother, and I have friends. I'm in my senior year, and happy about that. But, well, I forgot to add a detail… '_I have a daughter.'_

Her name is Emily Hope Nelson. Hope is Sean's middle name. But the baby is not Sean Cameron'…. '_It's his best friend's child.'_

The kid is 2 years old right now. She was born in June, 2005. A month early, but fully healthy. She was born before I went anorexic. I'm almost done with my senior year. A few exams and then school's over. School is over, as in finished. Crazy, you might think. It's not that bad. My mom's really supportive. My baby brother's getting 4 in September, so he's almost 2 years older than my daughter.

This is my life… '_Emma Christine Nelson's life.'_ Love it or hate it, I choose to love it. Although I have anorexia, still. I'll be an anorexic for the rest of my life, even if I don't starve myself for years, it's still me. I haven't thrown up for about four months now. My psychiatrist is proud of me. So am I. I have to keep life going. Because of my daughter. I adore her.

One more detail… I live in New York. I moved away when I found out I was pregnant. My best friend, Manny Santos, came with us. My dad, Snake Simpson, had to turn down his job there. It was good he got another teaching job so soon here. The father doesn't know anything about the kid… _We used a condom._ Besides, I hate the guy. I wouldn't go back to Toronto; I wouldn't go back to him. He's a total jerk. He just used me. And I was vulnerable then.

But, if I used a condom, how did I get gonorrhea? … '_The condom slipped off.'_ That's why I got pregnant, also. This is my life. Kinda screwed up, you might think. It's really not that bad. New York is a great place to live in. Though, something in my head keeps telling me to go back, I'm not going. We still have the house in Toronto; we're renting it to some couple.

Over all, my life's good. Better than you might imagine. But… '_I don't care what other people think of me'._ It's my life, not anyone else's, and I'm living it the way I want.

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"Em, stop writing in your diary!" Manny rolled her eyes, "We'll be late for school! We have our final exam!"

I smile at my best friend. I always thought she's better-looking than me. Now I think I'm as beautiful as she is. Or, at least, I try to think that way. Her body's tanned, her hair is black, and she's the bubbliest person I've ever met. She's happy or excited almost all the time. But, there are times when she's depressed and sad. There are times when she cries in our room for the whole night, non-stop. She's sensitive. Still, I admire her. I admire my best friend. My best friend is like a sister to me now. We've lived together for 2 years now.

I close my diary and follow her in a hurry. Our last exam… '_Last exam.'_ Then we're free. I smile. I want to be free from school. I want to be with my daughter, I want to find a boyfriend. I want to forget the past.

As we're going to school, a few students greet us. Our new friends. As I look at them, I remember my old friends – JT, Toby, and Liberty. I miss them so much. Now I know that I have to go back to Toronto.

"Em, what is it with you today?!" Manny sighed, "How can you be so dreamy?"

I smile weakly, "I'll go to Toronto when the school's over."

"Really?" Manny smiles.

"Yeah… I have to see JT, Toby and Liberty." I confess, "I miss the so much."

We gather into a classroom. The teacher tells us the rules – cell phones and pagers have to be out, no talking, you have 45 minutes. And finally – good luck. I give a nervous Manny an encouraging smile and get to work.

As 45 minutes pass, we give our papers away. Manny and I squeal outside the school.

"We did it!" She screams, "You here me?!"

"We don't know for sure yet." I say, "We have to wait for the answers. Till tomorrow, we haven't really done it yet."

"Still!" Manny hugs me tightly, "Em, we did it! That was our last exam! Show some happiness!"

I laugh, "Come on, let's go celebrate!"

Usually we go by bus to a café, but today we're so hyper and happy, that we decide to walk. We talk and laugh as I bump into someone.

"I'm so sorry!" I laughed and looked up to see Jay, "Oh my god!"

Manny's eyes widened, so did mine. We looked at Jay. Jay looked so… _Jay_. He didn't look any different, but it was so weird to see him in New York.

"What are you doing here?" I finally asked.

"Helping Sean move here," Jay smirked, "I guess you live here, Greenpeace."

"Yeah, we do." Manny said, "Sean is moving to New York?!"

"Yeah, why?" Jay smirked.

"Um, where is he?" I ask.

"Emma?!" Sean grins and hugs me.

I'm in shock. I'm hugging Sean. Sean's hugging me. After two years. And he has changed so much!

"Come with us!" I finally say, "Both of you! We're going to celebrate!"

"What exactly?" Jay moved closer.

"Last exam," I choked out.

"Well, let's drive wherever you're going." Jay gestured to a red car.

"You got a new car?" I asked.

"It's mine." Sean grinned.

We sit in and give him the directions to the café. I still can't believe they're here. My first love and my… '_Daughter's father.'_ I frown, realizing I should tell him.

"I have to say something." I confess when we're in the café.

"A toast?" Jay chuckled, "No need."

"Jerk," I roll my eyes, "You're a dad."

"What?!" Jay chokes on his coke, "No!"

"Yes!" I look down at my food and repeat, "You're a dad."

"I'm a dad…" Jay repeats, "That's not possible!"

"It is." I frown, "That was the reason why we moved."

"We…" I cut him off,

"'_Used a condom,'_" I roll my eyes, "Don't you think I don't know that? Besides that I got pregnant, I got gonorrhea!"

"So he's what, two years old?" Sean asked.

"It's a she." I correct, "But yes."

"That's… news" Sean chuckles.

"Jay?" I look at him, "Aren't you gonna say anything?"

"What's there to say?" Jay stood up, "I just found out I have a two year old daughter!"

"Where are you going?" I bit my lip. Please don't leave!

"Leaving," Jay started to leave but I got up and pulled him back,

"No!"

"I think that's my decision to make." Jay snapped.

"Like it was your decision to use me?!" I yelled, "Can't you at least come and see her?"

"Fine," Jay agreed.

So much of a celebration… '_It was a disaster.'_ Why did I tell Jay he's a dad? Why?! Sean used my directions and we got to mine and Manny's home. It was a two-story house. My parents' bedroom, kitchen, the living room and the master bathroom were downstairs. On the second floor, there were Emily's room, bathroom, a smaller living room and mine and Manny's room. There was supposed to be different rooms for us, but we decided to make one a living room, so Manny and I were living in the same room. It wasn't any problem, we got along great.

Mom was home with Emily when we got there. I explained the situation in another room to her, and she left. I took Emily and went to the living room where Jay, Sean and Manny were waiting.

"This here is… '_Emily Hope Nelson.'_" I smiled.

"Hope's my middle name!" Sean remarked.

"It's a girl's name actually!" I chuckle, "I like that name!"

"Sean, come." Manny stood up, "Let's leave them alone."

Sean nodded and followed Manny. So there was just the two of us – Jay and I. I sat next to him silently. He continued to stare at the child. '**_She looks like her…'_** Jay made a remarked to himself. '**_She's blonde. But she has my smirk.'_** Jay finally gave a half smirk,

"Hey there,"

"Hello." Emily said in a light voice.

"Emily, this is Jay." I smiled, "Your daddy."

"Really?" Emily lit up, "Why haven't I seen you?"

"Because I was away." Jay smirked, "Far, far away in the land of… cars."

I laughed, "That's right. Because cars are his life."

Jay chuckled, "They are!"

"I know!" I assured.

"Do you want to play?" Emily asked.

"Why don't you go find Manny?" I suggested, "She's upstairs with a man, his name is Sean."

"Do they have a baby, too?" Emily asked.

"No!" I laughed, "They're just there, talking. Go and play with them, ok? I have to talk to daddy."

"Ok." Emily smirked.

"Emily…" I responded with a smirk, "What are you up to?"

"Nothing," Emily bit her lip.

"Alright, I'll come with you to make sure you won't listen to our talk." I laughed and went upstairs with her, leaving Jay downstairs.

After a minute, I came back downstairs. I looked at Jay, who was as puzzled as I. What are we going to do? Well, I had my plans, but what would he decide? Because deep down, I knew I still liked him… '_I liked him a lot.'_

"She has my smirk." Jay remarked with a trademark smirk.

"I know." I sat next to him on the couch, "Jay what will you do?"

"How am I supposed to know?!" Jay got angry, "I… I know nothing about kids!"

I looked at him. It was true. He probably didn't know anything about children. But I knew he'd be a great dad. Because he was so playful and childish… _Like all the guys._ I added in my mind. But Jay Hogart wasn't the kind of a guy who would take care of a kid, Jay Hogart liked to party. Jay Hogart liked to steal. Jay Hogart… '_Couldn't be a dad.'_ Maybe biologically, but not in life. He was a bad boy, and he wasn't planning to change that. All of a sudden, that Jay Hogart, Degrassi's own bad boy, kissed me. Passionately. I was longing for that kiss for two years. I was longing for him for two years. And now I bumped into him on the street. Ironical, you might think. But maybe not… '_Maybe it was fate.'_

"Emma," He used my real name for once, "I… You're different then any other girl."

"Is that good?" I asked.

"I didn't want to use you." Jay confessed to me, "But… Being a dad… Isn't that kind of extreme?"

"It's reality!"

"I know…" Jay sighed, "I'll stay at Sean's."

I squealed, "I love you!"

"Me too," Jay confessed and kissed me.

Like I said, maybe it was fate. Maybe it wasn't. Maybe it was just a coincidence. I'll never know. But now… '_Now I have a family.'_ He has changed so much, from the inside. And I loved him. Truly loved him.


	2. Dating

**A/N: So I'm back! And yes, this was supposed to be a oneshot, but a great friend of mine wanted it to continue, so I did :)**

_Disclaimer- I still don't own Degrassi. I never will, so don't worry, this mess I write up here will NEVER come on TV._

_**PS! It takes place 2 weeks after!**_

I look at my best friend who is getting ready for a date. She's going on a date… _With Sean_. Yes, Sean Cameron. Emily was pointing at clothes she liked, helping Manny choose. Although she liked most of the clothes.

"Emma, please help me!" Manny whined, "I need to look good! No, wait, I need to look _great_!"

I laughed, "Emily's helping."

"Like she's any help…" Manny rolled her eyes. The second after she saw Emily sad and pouting. "No offence, sweetie, but you like _everything_! I need something specific!"

"You look great in everything." Emily pouted.

I gave a look at Manny, "Listen to her, she's better than me."

"Please, Em!" Manny begged, "You know what he likes! You only read books, write in your diary, and dream about Jay!"

"Manny, I don't know what he likes." I rolled my eyes, "We went out years ago! Go as yourself, ok? It's no use to put on my goodie-goodie clothes, if it's not you. If he likes you, then he likes you for you, not because you're my best friend."

"Thanks for the lecture." Manny laughed and blushed, "But I'm nervous!"

"Sean is a really laid back person." I shrugged, "You'll probably go eat somewhere and then go to the movies. He likes people to be themselves. So don't go all goth, or all goodie-goodie. He won't like that." I finally shut up, but added, "How was that?"

"Thanks, Em." Manny smiled. "So, do you have any plans for tonight? While I'm out with Sean…"

"Just watching Emily," I mumbled and turned back to the book I was reading.

"You told me daddy's coming over." Emily pouted.

"Ohh…" Manny smirked and climbed on my bed, "Got any plans?"

"No, I don't." I rolled my eyes, "Let me read…"

I saw Manny smirk more, but at least she left me alone. No, I wasn't going to have sex with Jay or anything like that. Emily was here! And Manny would be back from her date pretty early, too. And I don't think we're that serious with Jay. Not yet. Though he loves Emily. And Emily loves him. They get along so great. Although yes, they are both so stubborn all the time! They _always_ have to have at least one little fight when Jay's here. But most of the time they get along great.

"Em, I'm going now!" Manny smiled, "wish me luck."

"Good luck…" I smirked.

"Hey, you look great." Sean smiled.

"Thanks." Manny smiled back, "Where are we going?"

"To the movies?" Sean suggested.

"Sure." Manny nodded as Sean took off. It all seemed so weird and unrealistic. She never though she'd like _Sean_! But yet, here she was, in Sean's car, driving to the movies with him. Though yes, she had to admit, that in seventh grade, when there was no Craig and no other boys, she had liked Sean a little. But then, the guy only had eyes for Emma. But she got over the crush soon, because Craig came.

They walked to the mall and while waiting in the popcorn line, Sean finally spoke up, "Haven't you thought about going back to Toronto?"

"Lots and lots of times," Manny confessed, "But I couldn't leave Emma. And I actually like it in here. Living New York is like a dream come true. Although… For the dream to be perfect, I'd have to be an actress."

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"Heyy!" Emily grinned at her dad.

"Hey Emily," Jay smiled, "Hi Em."

"Hey." I smiled and kissed him.

"I hope you won't do that for the whole night." Emily crossed her arms on her chest, pouting.

Jay smirked, "No, we won't. We will play with you, too."

"We're in the middle of having dinner." I mentioned, "Want some?"

"Nope, already ate." Jay assured.

"Ok. Come on Emily, let's go finish our food." I smiled at my daughter.

"Not hungry." Emily pouted, "I wanna play!"

"As soon as you finish your food, you'll get to play." I told Emily and took her hand, leading her into the kitchen. The evening went by quickly as we concentrated on Emily.

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"Thanks, I had fun." Manny smiled sweetly at Sean as they got back home.

"Yeah, me too," Sean confessed.

"Did you know I crushed on you back in the seventh grade?" Manny blushed, "Cause I did. You know, before Craig." 

"Seriously?" Sean chuckled, "Um… Wow!"

Manny blushed even more, "I should go. You know, check on the parents."

"Can I come?" Sean smirked.

"Do you think they're… doing something?" Manny giggled.

"Let's find out." Sean got out of the car.

"Khm… Hi…" Manny and Sean smirked.

"We're only kissing!" I threw a pillow at them that I found on the couch, "Jeez!"

"Right…" Manny giggled.

"Jay…" Sean smirked.

"Cameron, hi," Jay glared at them.

"Aw, not getting any?" Manny teased.

Jay looked away, obviously blushing. I just glared at Manny, embarrassed. Finally, Jay and Sean left and I went to check on Emily with Manny. As we were in our beds soon after that, we started to question each other.

"So, how was the date?" I smirked.

"It was really cool, we watched a chick flick." Manny smiled, "Sean's a really cute guy. I really like him… But you?!" 

"Well, we were busy with Emily." I started, "But then she got tired, so we put her to sleep. Actually, I did. And then we watched a movie, and then we made out."

"Were you thinking of going more serious?" Manny squealed.

"Manny!" I shouted out loud, "You're really dirty!"

"I know." Manny grinned, "So are you."

I rolled my eyes. "I wasn't thinking of going more serious, because I knew you'd be home soon. Ok?"

"But if it wasn't for me?" Manny still grinned.

I felt uneasy, "I don't know… I think Jay wants to… But I'm not so sure…"

"Come on, it's not like it's your first time!" Manny giggled.

"Yeah but, I don't want him to leave me right after that." I explained.

**A/N: So this was it! The new chapter. I hope I'll update soon. And I know I have a bad fame here because of my lack of updating, but I TRY, ok? And the next chapter will be about Jay & Emma. I'm thinking of doing a chapter where they talk things through because of Emma's doubts.**


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